Attitude

One of my favorite sayings to my kids has always been “you’ve got to control what you can control and your attitude is one thing you have control over.”  A for Attitude is strategically located right smack dab in the middle of the P.E.A.C.E acronym.  Attitude affects the outcome of almost everything we do. 

Studies show that people with positive attitudes are healthier, live longer and are more effective on the job.  Years ago, when clinging to his life in a German concentration camp, Victor Frankl found a way to survive the mental anguish he experienced as he witnessed those around him being killed and tortured during the Holocaust.  He was quoted as saying “Everything can be taken from a man or a woman but one thing.  The last of human freedoms to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances to choose one’s own way.”  Later Frankl was quoted; “Between stimulus and response there is a space.  In that space is our power to choose our response.  In our response lies our growth and freedom.”  Stephen Covey, the author of one the greatest self help books of all time “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People” used this Frankl quote to help people understand they have control over their attitude and ultimately their lives, and the control lies in the space between stimulus and response. 

Think about it, we are stimulated all day long and we respond to the stimulus.  When I watch my poor Cincinnati Bengals play football and something bad happens, which is most of the time, I am stimulated by the bad event and I have a choice in how my response will be…I don’t have to get angry.  How many times do we let other people, places and things control our responses and ultimately our attitude and we think nothing of it?  Back when I was in the pits of my addiction the drugs and alcohol had control over my “space.”  Co-dependent people allow other people to control their “space.”  People that hate their jobs are usually allowing their “space” to be controlled by a boss or a co-worker.  Some people allow the weather to control their “space.”  Depressed people allow depression to control their “space”…I could go on and on.

Take back your “space” between Stimulus and Response.  Those people with the most effective attitudes are people who have learned to control the space between stimulus and response.  There are many different ways to regain control of your “space” and here are a few that have worked for me.

1.  Having a plan for your life is the first step in taking ownership of the space between stimulus and response (I wrote about this a few blogs ago).  If I know where I’m going it is hard for other people, places and things to invade that “space” and corrupt my attitude.  

2.  Have daily prayer time and Bible reading especially read the gospels.  Learning how Jesus responded to situations is a great way to learn how to handle situations you will face throughout the day.  The book of Proverbs also serves as a great way to live life. 

3.  Try hard to maintain a conscious contact with God throughout the day.  When you do, suddenly God begins to control your “space.” 

4.  Put good “things” into your body, nurture your “space.”  When I say good things I mean music, literature, food etc…  You will be amazed at how this will strengthen your “space” and positively impact your response.

5.  Until you are able to stand on your own two feet and keep other people, places and things out of your “space,” create boundaries and stay away from those things that historically have controlled your “space” and ultimately your attitude.

6.  Surround yourself with people who control their “space” and subsequently have positive attitudes.

As I stated earlier, Attitude plays a huge role in the other 4 areas of the P.E.A.C.E. acronym.  I am much better at Planning, putting forth Effort, working with others (Community) and doing things that give me Energy when I am in control of my attitude.  I can watch all of this go down the tubes as soon as I let something else control it.

With all of this being said, the bottom line is this.  As Christians the “space” between Stimulus and Response should be filled with the Holy Spirit.  God gives us the ability to respond as Jesus would in any situation.  God knows we will never be perfect at this but I believe he wants to see us reach and grow towards having our “space” filled with the Holy Spirit.  As Frankl said “In our response lies our growth and freedom.”  Once we begin to control our “space” by allowing God’s spirit to flow through us we will experience unbelievable growth and freedom in our attitude.  And remember…this is all a process it is not an event.  Try to get better one day at a time.

P.E.A.C.E.