Last night as I was having fellowship prior to our Next Step Recovery service at church I saw an old friend of mine. I was excited because this man has been fighting alcoholism for years and instantly I thought “cool he has shown up at our recovery service and maybe he is ready to get serious about his problem.” I extended my hand and said “hey buddy great to see you how are you?” His entire body began shaking as he started to cry. It took what seemed like an eternity for him to mutter the words “I’ve lost everything Jay, I hate myself and I don’t know what to do.”
What sucks is this is a weekly thing at the Next Step (talking with people who are in despair) but this was a person I had grown up with. We graduated high school together, played sports together, ran around together and of course partied together. I want him to make it. He has kids he has a mom and dad who dearly love him but the disease of alcoholism has taken everything from him. I offered this man my assistance and told him to call me. Whether he will take me up on it or not is always a question I can never answer. Alcoholics and addicts are like greased hogs they are so hard to catch and often times it comes down to whether or not they’ve reached a point of utter defeat and subsequent surrender. It takes one to know one.
The key to whipping anything we are in bondage to is surrender. We must be willing to admit defeat and then immediately seek guidance from someone other than ourselves, preferably God. So many of us almost die from the disease of addiction and lose everything because we think we should be able to whip the problem on our own. Our problem was classified as a disease over 60 years ago because it is not something that can be whipped through our own personal power. I chuckle to myself when I hear someone say “I quit drinking on my own will power and therefore it can’t be a disease.” “Yeah, well you probably weren’t addicted when you quit” is my thought when I hear that rationale.
You want to know something? I’ve run marathons as well as dozens of triathlons and at some point during each and every one of those events I reached a point where it became a test of mind over matter and everytime my will power won out. I’ve built a business over the past 30 years where mental toughness has gotten me through very challenging financial situations. I get up every morning 3 hours prior to leaving for work in order to pray, meditate, read, exercise and eat. I am very disciplined. Just this morning I ran 10 miles and this came after a 40 mile bike ride yesterday and a week where I put in over 60 hours of work.
I am not tooting my horn but I am simply trying to make a point and that point is I am a pretty mentally tough person but the one thing in my life that whipped my butt totally and nearly cost me everything was my addiction to drugs and alcohol. I tried several times to beat it on my own will power but it just continued to beat me until it was almost too late.
Addiction to a point of powerlessness over anything is a disease and it can only be whipped by surrendering to a power greater than ourselves and that is God. Then it becomes a slow process of taking medicine daily but the medicine we take does not come in the form of a pill or elixir. The medicine we take comes in the form of people, places and things that will help us transform our thinking. Like I often say, we don’t have a drinking problem, we have a thinking problem.
Will my buddy make it? I don’t know. It will come down to whether or not he becomes willing to admit defeat and turn his back on the old places, spaces and faces and turn to the light of God in new places, spaces and faces. I’ve helped countless numbers of people over the years and far more fail than succeed. This disease sucks!
P.E.A.C.E.
