This past Thursday the young man who was working with me on my first book was tragically murdered by his step father.
Throughout my life God has blessed my presence with many interesting and talented people. I can say that Brandon (pictued above with my daughter at a church youth camp) was one of THEE most interesting and talented individuals I’ve ever been associated with…and he was only 22 years old! But beyond that, Brandon lived life the way Jesus tells us to live.
Although he left this earth at the age of 22, Brandon spent almost a third of his life teaching Sunday school at our church. Others speak about Brandon being a great role model for his siblings and a great son to his parents. What I loved about Brandon was his creative side as I’ve been so pumped in anticipation of where he would take my skills as a writer. Brandon was also close with my wife as they worked with the creative designer at our church on various projects. It was Brandon who motivated my wife to get serious about her painting talents and that she has done. She always said Brandon was an “old soul in a young person’s body.”
And then in a blink of an eye he is gone.
As I was mourning the loss of Brandon yesterday, I got word from one of my teammates from my college basketball playing days that a former teammate of ours dropped dead of a heart attack that morning. The numb feeling from the loss of Brandon turned to a dead feeling as I shook my head in disbelief upon hearing this second piece of difficult news in less than 24 hours.
I’ve lived long enough to know that shit is gonna happen and tragedy has been amongst us since the beginning of time. It is when it hits close to home that people begin saying Why God? This weekend our pastor will be preaching about this topic at our church because our entire church community has been rocked and is grieving the tragic loss of one of it’s greatest servants.
My question is not “Why God?” in the sense of “why do you let things like this happen God?” But “Why God?” in the sense of “why should we live a life fueled by God when he lets such awful things happen?
Like I’ve said many times and the Bible will confirm, we are born into sin and at our core is evil, “Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me.” Psalm 51:5 (NIV).
As a sinner I know I need God’s help in order for me to attempt to overcome my sin and my worldly tendencies, and in-turn live for Him instead of me…and this is a daily walk. All of us have the ability to commit murder just as much as we have the ability to live as a servant of God. The difference is all about WHO we are living for and Jesus tells us very clearly in Revelations what happens when we live for self and what happens when we live for God:
“Behold, I am coming soon! My reward is with me, and I will give to everyone according to what he has done. I am the Alpha and the Omega, the First and the Last, the Beginning and the End.
“Blessed are those who wash their robes, that they may have the right to the tree of life and may go through the gates into the city. Outside are the dogs, those who practice magic arts, the sexually immoral, the murderes, the idolaters and everyone who loves and practices falsehood.” This is Jesus speaking in Revelation 22:12-15.
So why choose God over ourselves and the world? It is simple to me, in my flesh all alone, I am a “dog” who will live outside the gates of heaven. With God I have a shot at eternal life and yes I believe there is an eternal life where Brandon recently walked through the gates of.
Only an awesome being like our God can have such a powerful plan that we can be murdered on earth but yet gain a bigger and better life in eternity…all within a blink of an eye. Choosing God over the world like our friend Brandon did is a choice worth making.
Brandon–your rewards in heaven are many, I can only hope mine will be a tenth of yours…and some how, some way, I hope God allows you the freedom to set up a Facebook website account in heaven. 🙂
P.E.A.C.E.
Thank you for this, Jay. You have always been one of my God guided leaders.
Jay Jordan taught me about forgiveness and said very similar things a few years back when I was going through a tough patch. He stood by me supporting me, just as Brandon did at that time. Then, I had to learn to forgive gossip and lies from people who I thought loved me. I thought that was tough, but Jay Jordan’s words helped me. I forgave and moved on, setting proper boundaries. Another lesson Brandon was encouraging me with, to learn to trust again.
Now I have to learn to forgive a horrible act, done in one moment without thought, to a young man who deserved to live a full life. My life lesson’s keep getting harder. By remembering Jay’s words and yours today (Ironic, both Jay. :} Something in a name? :}) I am working through another tragedy in my life.
Plus, I understand your pain in losing more than one loved one. There have been 4 people in my life that have passed in just the last few of months, including my mother and Brandon. My sorrow is overwhelming. My munchkin is having a tough time too, so trying to be strong for her. Looking to God.
None of us is perfect, but that is why Jesus came to save us. Your life lessons are now helping others. Passing it on. Again, thank you so much!
Jay,I wish I could give you an answer to the question “WHY”. I have experienced tragic experiences more often than a person should have to. Granted, when your pushin’ the down hill side of 59 it may be somewhat expected. However it is never easy to understand. I lost my dad when I was just 12, my mother passed when I was 32. I experienced cancer when I was 46. I lost my first mentor, Jay Jordan at way to young of an age. Then there was my very close friend and mentor Gary Cairns who pasted just two years ago. both of these guys were in my cell group. Then a third member of our cell group Bobette Borchard succumbed to cancer. another member of our group Ruth Gaines was diagnosed with a brain tumor and still another – Ted York with dimensia and Alzhiemers’, and again, I came to realize I was dealing with addiction and had to look at the harm it had caused in my marriage and relationships with friends and family. All this sh*t has and continues to happen in my life. Yet I have a God that loves me so much that he has kept me sober and free from my addiction(s). He has given me the strength to endure the saddest and most heartbreaking of times When I could have just as easily said “To hell with it” and caved in. That is the kind of God that I need in my life. One, that no matter how terrible the situation is, can lift me up, bring me comfort and protect me from Satan’s best shot.
Maybe the “Why” is because God wants us to have a relationship with him.
Reed